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How can you tell your child about divorce?

On Behalf of Knoll Leibel LLP | Feb 17, 2022 | Family Law |

As parents going through a divorce, you already have enough on your plate. Many of these concerns likely revolve around your child, such as custody or support matters.

However, before you even begin sorting such matters out, it is important for you to decide one thing first and foremost: when will you tell your child about the upcoming split?

Have a plan

Psychology Today takes a look at ways to break news of divorce to your child. Many experts disagree on the exact best methods of doing this, but there are some points that most of them seem to agree on, too.

First, have a plan with your co-parent first. Do not simply go into a conversation this important without a roadmap. Know what is on and off the table for discussion. Understand what you will share about the divorce now, later and never. Keep your boundaries as parents and child, but be prepared to answer as many of your child’s questions as you can.

Stay flexible

Two, be flexible. Understand that no two children will react exactly the same to news this big and life-changing. You know your child better than anyone, so you can predict the reactions they might have. However, no one can predict everything with perfect accuracy. Knowing how to roll with the punches can save time and heartache.

Provide reassurance

Finally, reassure your child that you love them. Many will self-blame during a divorce, having nowhere else to assign the guilt to. You want to do whatever you can to ensure your child knows they do not hold fault for the split. This is one of the best things you can do as a parent.

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